Posted by: megaschwez | November 29, 2010

Part III

Deli deca

3. Deca mecca

Why does no one ever order 210g of sun-dried tomatoes from the deli counter in Australian supermarkets? Because you feel like a dick, that’s why. You order in round figures, 100g or half a kilo. How come? Because we don’t have DECA.

One deca is a magical unit of measurement equivalent to 10g. For reasons no-one knows, only Austrians use it. At deli counters from Vienna to the alps, you can order 5 or 7 or 60 deca of artichoke hearts or animal product of your choice. In recipe books, your strudel requires not 2 cups of flour but 40 deca. I have yet to confirm the appropriate unit of measurement for class-A drugs, but asking for 1 deca of crack would presumably be both an interesting experiment and a prelude to a relatively heavy night.

Another mystifying aspect: it’s abbreviated ‘dag.’. Which is probably the primary reason that it’s never been taken up in Australia, where the term simultaneously means something like a nerd, and a piece of shit hanging off a sheep’s arse.


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